THE best Fettuccine Alfredo you have EVER had

If you are on a diet, skip this post.

Warning: this dish is loaded with fat and carbs of the worst kind on both accounts.

But if you want to die of a heart attack and go to Italian heaven, please, follow me this way.

THE Best Fettuccine Alfredo You Have EVER Had

First you need to chop up 1/3 cup of green onions really fine. If you are a fan of the food chopper, I strongly advise against it, the thin membranes of the onion make it virtually impossible to chop the green onions nicely, like you want them. Also chop 1/3 cup of parsley.

In a pan put a stick of butter, REAL butter please, preferably unsalted, and melt. Add onions and parsley and cook on med. heat. 

As soon as the butter is melted add 1/2 tsp of garlic powder, 1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper (or less if you don't want too much spice), 1/4 tsp. white pepper and the same of black pepper. (I am not a fan of black pepper so I just add the token  few twists of the mill). Add a little bit of kosher salt. The Parmesan cheese will salt it lots, so you don't want it to be too salty. You can always add more later.

 Let that all bubble up and cook for a good 5 minutes or so, it's OK if it begins to brown some, just be sure your heat isn't too high and you actually burn it.

Then poor in your cream.

Bring to a boil, turn down, and reduce just minute or two, add the Parmesan cheese. (the cheese will do most of the thickening for you).

OOOOPS!!! I just got totally distracted by what was going on right beside me as I was stirring.

Sorry, back to the pasta.

After you reduce you can add shrimp if you want it with shrimp (I usually fix it this way). Make sure your shrimp is ready, all shells removed, devained, clean and it's even better if you lay them on a paper towel to soak up moisture. NEVER add frozen shrimp or even almost defrosted shrimp, it will curdle your cream.

It will take the shrimp only a few minutes to cook, don't overcook or they will be tough.

If you are going to add chicken, then wait till you sauce is done, the longer you cook it the thicker it will get, so just cook it till it has the consistency you want. I cook my chicken on a skillet. I simply flatten them out, sprinkle with course salt and a twist or two of pepper. I have my skillet nice and hot with EVOO and begin with the salted side down. After it is seared I turn the temp down and cook another 5 minutes or so. Then turn over and cook till done. Cut slices of chicken and lay on the Fettuccine Alfredo.

I totally know what you are thinking. "That isn't Fettuccine!"

Well, this is actually what you do when you don't realize you are out of fettuccine until you water is boiling, you are hungry, and you don't want to run to the store AGAIN.

Take it from me though, go to the store and get the fettuccine, it's lots better.

 

THE Best Fettuccine Alfredo You Have EVER Had

1 stick unsalted butter

1/3 Cup Green Onion

1/3 Cup Fresh Parsley

1/2 tsp. garlic powder

1/4-1/2 tsp. white pepper

1/8 tsp. cayenne

salt and black pepper to taste

1 Pint Whipping Cream

1/2-2/3 Cup Parmesan Cheese

Optional: add 1 Lb. fresh shrimp peeled and devained

or cooked chicken

Not optional: A resolve to enjoy and walk away with a clear conscious.

HA!

There it is again. Almost gone.